This year, for me, is a new chapter, having moved home and work
from one area of France to another. I now live with the OH in
the sunny Charente-Maritime, close to the coast. I swear that
sea air has breathed new life into us both, one way or another.
There’s something about that phrase, though, ‘moving on’, that
generates mixed emotions in many of us, I suspect. Sometimes we
don’t want to be told to ‘move on’ by well-meaning others; we
just want to stay put…in our anger, or grief, or comfort zone.
Whatever it is that’s holding us back, that’s ok too...as when
we’re ready, we’ll take those first few steps again.
We all move on eventually, whether we realise it or not. The
older we become, the more losses we’re likely to have
experienced in our lives, as well. Those bumps and bruises are
inevitable as we stumble, walk, run or ride along that road,
leading us forward to new experiences and hopefully better ones.
Our move was a response to a sudden, life-changing car accident
and personal loss. It became a catalyst for change that has
become positive and life-affirming. Ours is a household with
animals and I see a new contentment in them too, despite having
less freedom of movement, with a much smaller garden and new
outside noises around. It surprised me as to how well they
adapted to their new environment.
There are certain schools of psychotherapy that teach us to
become a blank page of sorts for our clients; to be the mirror
that they can reflect in. Nothing personal. My take on that is
that’s all very well. However, sharing parts of ourselves with
the other people that we’re working with can also help to create
change for the better. We’re all human, after all.
So, if you’re feeling stuck, it might help to remember that you
do have a choice. It may not be obvious, or easy, but just
because you can’t see the way forward right now, doesn’t mean it